To start this out, I should mention that I repeated a previous gym prep error on Monday...I'll let you guess which (hint: pick the one that seems most embarrassing).
This morning, though, I remembered everything and had a pretty good workout, then hit the locker room to get ready. After I showered I began shaving. At this time, a rather large man passed behind me passing from the shower to the lockers. I say rather large, but that may be an understatement...he's morbidly obese. He's probably 5'7" and I would guess 375 lbs...maybe more. He's large enough that he doesn't have to wear anything to keep...um..."himself"...covered up. Ahem. I see him almost every day, so the sight isn't shocking anymore. I've actually started to feel sad seeing him...it can't be a great way to live.
But the real kicker was the septegenarian who obviously hasn't seen that sight before. After Big Guy passed, the elder gentleman (used somewhat facetiously) came into view in my mirror. His short walk to water aerobics had been stopped short by his dentures following his chin to the floor as he stared wide-eyed behind his coke bottle glasses for at least 12 seconds at the naked glory of morbid obesity strolling past. I was hoping he would have caught my "Dude! What's the deal!? Don't you have any sort of decency!?" stare back at him in the mirror, but he obliviously turned and headed out to exercise his aging frame.
Anyway, in the tradition of Aesop, the moral of the story is: don't stare, because you're usually the one who ends up looking like a moron.
3.31.2010
3.11.2010
I Really Suck at this Whole Blogging Thing
It's been a long while (1 year, 8 months, 11 days) since I posted here. It couldn't necessarily be due to my self-diagnosed ADD...or it could. It isn't really an excuse, but I have the same problem with keeping a journal. As an update of my continued pursuit of the Unsmart, I offer the following example(s):
Late last year I began using the locker room at the gym. It's a bit of a time saver...go to work out, get ready there, and head straight to work. I've also been getting in to work earlier...all of which are not Unsmart in and of themselves. In my getting prepared for the gym (generally the night before) I have had the following mishaps, which haven't been discovered until the next day:
1. Forgotten socks - Luckily, the nearby Macey's (grocery store) had one pair of black men's socks (which has now become a bit of a joke at the office...you figure it out) left, and they were on sale for 99 cents.
2. Forgotten towel - This led to a necessary trip back home to shower. I guess I could have air dried, but I'll leave the extensive nackedness in the locker room to the old guys who come for water aerobics and the hot tub. (You're very welcome for that mental image.)
3. Mismatched shoes - Luckily I had brought jeans to wear to work, so I could wear my running shoes. Otherwise I'd have looked like the old folks at the mall who go to walk their laps for exercise wearing slacks and walking shoes (for Layton High alums who are my age or older, that means Mr. Petersen).
4. Forgotten garments - I just got showered and went commando back to the house, went in the back door so as not to wake the kids or Ang and snuck down into the laundry room where my lovely wife had a basket of clean g's.
I think that should sufficiently prove how Unsmart I am.
Late last year I began using the locker room at the gym. It's a bit of a time saver...go to work out, get ready there, and head straight to work. I've also been getting in to work earlier...all of which are not Unsmart in and of themselves. In my getting prepared for the gym (generally the night before) I have had the following mishaps, which haven't been discovered until the next day:
1. Forgotten socks - Luckily, the nearby Macey's (grocery store) had one pair of black men's socks (which has now become a bit of a joke at the office...you figure it out) left, and they were on sale for 99 cents.
2. Forgotten towel - This led to a necessary trip back home to shower. I guess I could have air dried, but I'll leave the extensive nackedness in the locker room to the old guys who come for water aerobics and the hot tub. (You're very welcome for that mental image.)
3. Mismatched shoes - Luckily I had brought jeans to wear to work, so I could wear my running shoes. Otherwise I'd have looked like the old folks at the mall who go to walk their laps for exercise wearing slacks and walking shoes (for Layton High alums who are my age or older, that means Mr. Petersen).
4. Forgotten garments - I just got showered and went commando back to the house, went in the back door so as not to wake the kids or Ang and snuck down into the laundry room where my lovely wife had a basket of clean g's.
I think that should sufficiently prove how Unsmart I am.
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